We have already discussed how to be a classy woman, as it is the foundation for elegance and success. If being classy is the first level of your level up journey, then being a high value woman is the top level. In this article, we will be analyzing the qualities of a high value woman, but also focusing on tips on how to improve yourself in the areas where you are struggling. After all, we’re all looking to improve ourselves in practical and measurable ways, and not just daydream about an ideal higher self.

If you want to see how to elevate yourself to that level, keep reading.

Self love

First and foremost, a high-value woman has a strong foundation, and that foundation is none other than her own love, appreciation and support. It is the way to grow thick, stable roots deep into the earth of her own consciousness, as that is the only way mountains can establish the strongest foundation.

If you’re still struggling with deep insecurity or self-acceptance issues, or self-loathing… learning to embrace who you are (physically, mentally, emotionally, spiritually) is the first and most important lesson to sort through if you want to level up and be a high value woman. Otherwise, any challenges appearing from the other qualities listed down below, will keep knocking you off balance, which is why the foundation comes first!

Helpful tips: there are so many amazing tips and soulful articles on self love that you can read, you just need to start connecting with yourself, and step by step offer yourself the healing, forgiveness and care that you have robbed yourself of until now.

Integrity

You may hear a lot about integrity being a staple of class, but what does it mean exactly for a high value woman? It means she has a certain set of principles that all apply to different areas of her life. These are her boundaries (personal life, relationships), her commandments (she would never do xyz), her principles which define what she stands for and what she believes in.

It can be related to spiritual or religious beliefs, it can be related to morality and ethics, it can be related to compassion or so many other things. It can even be about her business ethics, for instance refusing to associate her business or brand with cheap quality or products which she does not personally use or approve of. But the definite rule is this: she knows her principles, and she stands by them!

Good Manners

This should go without saying, as we have already discussed it in the How to be Classy article. It means having etiquette, having good manners, knowing to be polite and diplomatic and respectful, knowing how to navigate social conventions and situations. Good manners also includes being thoughtful and considerate of others. Never make a public scene or anything that will disturb or leaves others around you uncomfortable. There is always a graceful, diplomatic way of handling situations.

Looking polished

High value ladies have two rules in mind when getting dressed: classy, and dress for success. They make it a point to invest effort and care into their appearance, because they know how important presentation is. It is the first thing that other people see. Whether this is sensible and fair is another matter, but as smart ladies we should make use of this: by using it to our advantage, and also as a sign of self-respect and self-care.

It takes dedication to wake up every day and make a habit of looking good, looking like you’re dressed for success, looking put together. Although what that looks like is a subjective matter – beyond the general principle of the appearance being elegant and the clothing or accessories being of high quality (quality materials, tailored clothing, tasteful prints or colors, aesthetic combinations, etc).

As always, it’s not about spending 2-3 hours everyday to look catwalk-ready, it’s about being strategic and knowledgeable. Study what flatters your body best, your skintone, your face shape. What colors, what materials, what outfits flatter you best. It’s about knowing what works best for you, and creating an efficient routine of putting your outfit and appearance together.

Helpful tip: the quickest look is a sleek bun and classy suit – and it can be done in less than 30 minutes. Here’s how: a pro tip is to always prepare your outfit the night before, and make sure everything is lint-free, ironed, steamed and polished accordingly. That way, the next day all you have to do is get dressed, arrange your hair into a neat bun however it works best for your hair type or length, and voila! You’ll look like a million bucks. It’s all about being smart, ladies.

Growth mindset

This is all about the self development vibe, the glow up mindset. A HVW knows that self development is an ever changing journey, it’s a lifestyle, not just a temporary self-improvement plan tossed together overnight on the 1st of January. These ladies make it a habit and a priority to always keep working on themselves, slowly but surely.

That involves being open-minded to new information, to trying new things, cookies new cuisine, learning new languages, taking an etiquette class, signing up for online courses or certifications – whatever it is, she’s always on the move to check another box off her list in her beautiful journey of growth.

Strong Boundaries – Stands Up for Herself

Another essential quality. Having strong boundaries means first and foremost knowing what your boundaries are, and then being assertive about it. Whether you have some strange quirks, some things you like to avoid doing or saying because it causes anxiety or discomfort, then that is a boundary. If you don’t like discussing parts of your past, it is a boundary. If you have had any abuse (physical, emotional or otherwise) in the past, and are very particular about physical contact, then that is a boundary.

Anything relating to your standards, or your mental and emotional health falls under this category. If you don’t know them, now is the perfect time to pull out a pen and paper and list them all. If you don’t know them, how will others? If you don’t assert them, how will others respect them?

Helpful tip nr. 1: at the first red flag, be wary and on guard. There are exceptions when a mistake is made, and the person apologizes as it wasn’t out of malice. BUT, usually, when someone intentionally disregards your boundaries, it will just keep snowballing because it essentially means they don’t respect you or really care about your wellbeing. High value women never give 2nd opportunities to have their boundaries crossed. One strike, you’re out.

Helpful tip nr. 2: be assertive and forget about being too “pushy” or “too much”. Any situation where your boundaries are crossed, is a moment when you are absolutely exempt from thinking about hurting the other person’s feelings. Example: a date went wrong, you told them you want to go home, but they keep insisting to accompany you or go to his place. To hell with what they think or feel, they are blatantly disregarding your boundaries (hello red flag) in the very beginning (another red flag). Stop worrying about coming across too this or that; stand your ground, and if you don’t feel safe, stay at the restaurant/bar until a friend picks you up.

Healthy Priorities

What does it mean to have healthy priorities? It means she prioritizes her wellbeing, her mental health, her physical health, her happiness first and foremost. Everything else comes after. She knows that is not selfish, in fact it’s a form of self love, because how else can you be your best self, and help others in the process, if you’re giving from an empty cup? You have to keep replenishing yourself.

You are an ocean of love, an ocean of compassion, and most importantly, an infinite source of potential. But when you put yourself on second place, and forget to catch up with yourself or any selfcare practices – darling, you burn out! And we all know, the burnout is real. That is why a high value woman is knowledgeable and mindful in this regard, and makes sure she is always number one.

Kindness

A woman can have all the riches in the world and look like a supermodel, but if her heart is made of ice, she will never be a high value woman. Being inherently – or intentionally – compassionate means being a respectful, kind human being. It means that yes, you’ve put yourself together, but now you will also take heed and help others as well! Kindness can be both inherent, or a day by day choice.

When you make it a habit and a mindset to do what you can to help others grow the way you have, when you have the growth mindset but also pass on the torch of knowledge, that is when your blessings will be multiplied hundredfold. The universe favors those who, upon finding success, help others find the same!

This doesn’t mean you have to break the bank or sell half your wealth to donate to charities, it’s simply about the intention, always trying to find smaller or greater ways that you can pass on the kindness and knowledge.

Respectful

You can tell a lot about a person by the way she treats people of lesser financial status or any other socially-conceived status. Being a high value woman means you show respect to all regardless of anything, you treat others the way you expect them to treat you. This doesn’t mean being a doormat, but it does mean showing the courtesy of respect, of being nice first and foremost.

If people do not treat you afterwards with equal respect, that is a reflection of their self-worth and mindset, and nothing to do with you. In those cases as well, what defines you is not how you’re treated, but how you react. So you can remain diplomatic and classy, while still ensuring healthy boundaries, and cutting off anyone that doesn’t offer the same level of respect. And don’t forget – high value ladies don’t waste time asking or demanding respect. They simply walk away from those that don’t. Why? Because your standards and self-worth are non-negotiable (mic drop).

Long-term, strategic thinking

Whether it’s about financial investments, purchases, or her dating strategy, or the way she decides if a relationship is worth her time – it’s all about long-term thinking. She considers her options, pro’s and cons, and weighs whether it is worth her money, her emotional investment, or her time. She is not the superficial sort to step into an official dating status with a man unless she considers him worth her time, and reaching at least the baseline of her standards.

Anything less, is a genuine waste of her time. She knows what she wants, and is over and done settling for less. Her time is valuable, and she is an asset, a trophy, a gift to any friend or partner – because she’s got her life together, done the inner work, and she’s only interested in surrounding herself with people of equal value.

Punctual

It should go without saying, a woman of high value knows that time equals money. Time equals potential and so it is precious. Her time is valuable, and it only follows that everyone else’s time is also precious. It’s a sign of good manners and integrity to respect other people’s time by being punctual to invitations, events, meetings. She also knows that if anything intervenes on the commitment she has made, it is also a sign of respect to duly notify those that are inconvenienced by her being late, she never waits until the last second or says nothing at all.

A few minutes is all it takes to drop an email, or leave a text and just relay the message in a classy way. Nobody will mind you letting them know in advance – that way they can make other arrangements if needed.

Knows how to handle failure

This might sound confusing if you believe that a HVW is the pinnacle of success, and consequently should know nothing of failure. BUT, knowing how to deal with failure is actually an essential quality for a high value woman! Why? Because failure is part of life, even daily life. If you don’t arm your mindset, if you don’t equip yourself with mental strength, and a practical approach to failure, how will you achieve anything?

High value women understand that it’s a natural part of life, they do what they can do avoid it, but when and if it happens – they dust themselves off, they pull out their notebook with Things To Keep In Mind for Future Cases, add it to list, and then they jump right back into the game once they have a smart (and newly improved) plan. Fail again? No problem! Try again and again, until you succeed. In short, HVW understand that failure is simply an opportunity to learn, to improve, and only do better in the future.

• Here’s another secret of high-value women: they understand that true failure isn’t messing up a task or not achieving a financial/business goal, or any such thing. True failure is when you give up and stay down. True failure is when you stop trying to get up. So remember… until you give up on your dream, you can never really fail!
• Another thing to keep in mind is, you can’t let yourself be terrified of failure. You should be more terrified of having that dreamlife so clear in your mind… and never having tried to make it your reality! Living with that sort of regret, even all up into your 80s… that’s what’s scary! Never actually giving yourself the opportunity to create a better life for yourself.

Confidence

Built upon her selflove, her achievements, and self-awareness, confidence is the amalgam of all three. She knows that self-acceptance, being able to take pride and appreciation in her achievements, and most of all, knowing what her true worth and potential is – these are all the foundation for natural confidence that comes effortlessly. And if not, confidence can also come by faking until you make it, acting like xyz until you are xyz, and it’s just as valuable and powerful.

Remember that the self image you present to the world, is what they will take at face value. If your posture is always straight, chin up, voice collected and in command, and your actions are of integrity, you will naturally look confident (even if you are not).

Helpful tips: if you need more help in this area, don’t fret! The internet is all at your disposal. Look up books, videos, podcasts on how to be more confident, how to act or look more confident. There’s even loads of valuable TedTalks about this. In this case, knowledge is your friend, body language is your friend, gaining life experience is your friend. Use all the tools you can to elevate your confidence, depending on what resonates with you, and it’s only a matter of time until you get there.

Authenticity

Now, authenticity is closely tied to confidence but it is a quality that is essential in its own right. Being your authentic self is an art, but what does it mean to be authentic for a high value woman?

It means that whatever her fashion taste is, her preferences, her small quirks and delights, her passions and hobbies, she honors them. Maybe it’s wearing her hair in a particular unusual style. Maybe it’s a cheesy, outdated comedy which has a special place in her heart. Or maybe she just likes to go boxing every day at 6 AM, or do wedding photography on Saturdays because it uplifts her romantic streak as well as creative one. Whatever it is, she never shrinks herself or waters down any part of herself down just to appease others, but she will practice discernment and be highly selective with whom she shares those aspects, as well as when and where.

She would also never agree to give up her dream career (or business) for a partner, for any reason, or let people disrespect that career path or creative outlet. After all, it is what lights her soul on fire and brings her joy, why shouldn’t she honor herself and embody her authentic self? That’s her birthright, as it is all of our own!

Helpful tips: let’s say your partner doesn’t understand your art, your writing, or any other creative endeavor that fulfills you. Perhaps you need to communicate better with your partner just how important this is for you and to have their support. But just as likely, if that doesn’t work – then it may be time to level up your partner (with a new one). Because being supportive of one’s creativity and aspirations is non-negotiable, and a staple of any healthy relationship! Imagine living all your life with a partner that neither understands nor respects such a huge aspect of you – absolutely not! You deserve better than living a life where you’re never seen in your wholeness, for all the magical facets that make up your radiant self.

Vivid inner life

She has hobbies, passions, exercises she likes to do, things she’s passionate about, has her own career going. In short, this means she has a rich, vivid inner life, she’s not just a blank canvas. Don’t just be a woman who is obsessed with relationships or a man or household, and have no inner world of your own.

To be a high value woman, you have to invest in yourself first and foremost! To deeply know and love yourself. How can you do that if you never spend time in the temple of your inner world?

The importance of having a vivid inner world comes back to the idea of a strong foundation. When you treasure your inner world, paint it bright and colorful, all that radiance will overflow into the outside world as well, to those around you. The same applies if your inner world is an empty, blank canvas, and you’re running around most of your life chasing things that make you forget about the emptiness inside.

Elegance

There is an air of refinement about a high value woman. In her energy, the way she carries herself, her way of speaking and walking. In her mannerisms and the way she handles any situation. It’s more than just being classy. Everything about her just emanates (but not shouts) “I’m expensive, I’m luxury, I’m high value”. From the first look at her, people just know. The same way her presence commands respect, so does her energy inspire elegance.

In short, when all the other high value qualities are present, the overall impression she leaves is that of elegance and class. It’s the sum of her self love, confidence, polished appearance, education and intelligence.

Takes calculated risks

She knows that if she never steps out of her comfort zones, she’s not going to reach the stars. She understands this implies taking risks, but not just any kind – calculated ones, because she is always strategic and business-savvy about her choices. They are backed by facts and research (market research, calculations, etc), so that she is all the more confident in her judgement.

Whether this means quitting a 9-to-5 job in her early level up journey, or scaling her business significantly, or investing in a new business, she knows what’s up, and she knows how to get things done.

Financially Savvy

A high value woman is highly educated when it comes to finances, investment thinking, budgeting, planning. She knows what will be an asset (provides return of investment, value increases with time) and what will be a liability (value decreases, bad investment).

Financial security is important to her, which is why she is smart and works towards having her own business, or setting up multiple streams of passive income, or making calculated investments (real estate investing, stocks, shares)… or ALL of the above, so that her work once done (only once) will do the work for her and earn her money continuously. Working smart, not hard!

• In short, she knows the formula for financial success is:
  multiple streams of (passive) income + investments + own business = financial abundance
• And not this:
  working for someone else (offering time & experience, in exchange for $$) = financial abundance

Conclusion

A high value woman is the kind of polished, esteemed woman who genuinely has her life together, her finances are on point, her career is thriving, she has her own hobbies and interests and pastimes. She has a rich inner world where she feels whole within herself, and emanates confidence because she loves who she is. Most importantly, she knows who she is, what she stands for, and her boundaries are crystal-clear. And let’s not forget – she actively works on her inner self, on getting therapy or working on any inner wounds or toxic beliefs, because she is on a lifelong journey to become her best self.

That is why she is an asset in every sense of the word, to all that know her: friends, family, lovers. She is a true, supportive friend (to those that genuinely appreciate her and support her in return); she is a respectful, loving daughter/sister/mother (except with any toxic or abusive family members, in which case she has the strength to put a healthy mental, physical and emotional distance as needed); she is wife material; and she is so much more.

It should go without saying, that she has the potential to be anything she desires. That doesn’t mean she has to be any or all of these things. She has the vision, the strategic thinking, discipline and dedication to see any plan through. (And so, if you have the potential to be or have everything, why shouldn’t you have it all, darlings? After all, you deserve the best!)

If she wants to put aside any relationships, and focus on career and self-development only, she will do that and it does not detract from her femininity, so long as she is mindful to balance feminine/masculine energies. If she wants to settle down with a partner she feels seen, loved and honored by, she will do that and it does not detract from her high value. If she wants to do both, or neither by finding an alternate path that honors her, she can and she will, and owes no justification or explanation to others for it.

Whatever her choice, she holds complete freedom over her decisions and her life path, because she knows what she wants, and isn’t afraid to hold herself accountable for them. Come what may, she does what is right for herself, and knows that her intentions were in the interest of her highest good – and in the interest of becoming her highest self.

PS: A note on semantics. High value, high quality, high caliber woman – in my perspective they are all the same. There is no sense trying to micro-analyze every term that is meant as positive upliftment and empowerment, to only further cause division. If you invest in all of the above, you are both of high value (metaphorically or financially speaking) and high quality. It means you are a quality queen, period, and you should be proud of all the hard work you’ve invested into yourself.

I hope you enjoyed this article ladies, and that you will return to it again and again, inspired to become your best selves.