Classy ladies know that elegance isn’t just about looking put together, sporting french manicure and good manners. There are certain mindset & lifestyle aspects that many forget about, but they are essential to those of us looking to level up all areas of our lives.
In today’s world of oversharing every single detail of one’s life, the secret to stand out as a lady of class and self-possession, to maintain your allure of exclusivity and mystery, is this:
Keep your private business your own.
But how do you know what is appropriate to keep private, and what is alright to share? Let’s get into it.
1. Relationship issues aren’t classy

It may seem a good idea at the time to vent about your relationship frustrations or a troublesome ex on social media, or even the workplace. However, in the end it only creates drama and affects your reputation. Whether it’s from a personal account or business one (influencer or other), you’re still inviting the entire internet to formulate an opinion and take sides. My advice? Keep it short and sweet (“X and I separated but I wish him the best”), if relevant to your audience. If note, keep it private.
Either way it is done, spilling relationship tea creates drama, and drama is never classy. If you need to vent, reach for friends and family, your therapist, or your loyal journal that listens to anything without judgement!
2. Being a show-off isn’t elegant

It is normal to wish to share your excitement in tackling new goals, and you should! However, be mindful of what goals you are sharing so that you don’t end up oversharing and shooting yourself in the foot.
The internet is a vast place, and when you share great, ambitious goals, you are leaving them exposed to what energy other people associate it with. Classy ladies know that by being protective of your greatest goals, you are able to nurture them in the safety of your own pure intentions and confidence — at least until you do achieve them.
That aside, it is also true that keeping your goals secret helps with staying focused on accomplishing them, instead of caving under pressure or worrying about losing face in front of people that know about your goals.
3. Your income

This should go without saying. There is no worthwhile advantage to parading the number of zeroes on your income, and empty clout doesn’t count.
The only exceptions are possibly influencers or YouTubers whose niche lies in the finance or entrepreneurship domain, in which case sharing their experiences and advice further helps others.
If in doubt, a safe rule to stay financially savvy is keep anything related to your wallet private.
4. Mortgage, rent or debts

On any platform where you are easily identifiable and not anonymous, it’s simply foolish to expose your financial vulnerabilities. You never know who may come across the wrong information; people, companies, etc.
5. Confidential information

This can be so many things, there is no need to go into detail. If something seems too sensitive to share, it probably is, and you should keep it private.
6. Select achievements

Likewise as with goals you plan to achieve, any successful achievements are also a terrain you should tread with mindfulness. That is not to say they should be kept secret, it’s wonderful to be proud of your successes, and you should be!
But if you parade a laundry list of all that you have achieved, casually across social media, it can be construed as bragging and you may invite the wrong kind of audience drawn to drama, prone to jealousy. Is it really worth it, for the temporary validation? Not really.
Classy women don’t air out all their achievements in exchange for fleeting validation; they have a family, supportive circle of friends or close community for that purpose. As for social media and other spaces, they are discreet with what accomplishments they share with others.
7. Family drama

Another topic that should go without saying. Some issues and challenges should be kept in the confines of the respective homes, or the confines of a therapist’s room.
There’s nothing refined about a random stranger knowing all the tea on your aunt and your cousin’s girlfriend’s brother, or that time your mother-in-law had a breakdown at a Christmas reunion. If people want drama, redirect them to a TV. Your life is not a Spanish opera channel.
8. Childhood traumas

A very tempting topic, and one often shared with the best intentions. It may be because you’re trying to connect with strangers on social media, bonding on a discord forum with new friends, or just adding your two cents to an interesting IG post. In either case, it’s free ammunition for complete strangers to nose in on very personal matters that may only put more salt on the wound.
9. Your insecurities

Insecurities are a tricky topic, because it’s quite normalized in today’s age to (trauma) bond with other women over insecurities, especially those regarding our bodies.
Classy ladies know that such discussions should be conducted in private: between friends, family, partners, or in either case between people that trust and respect each other.
Remember, any vulnerabilities you share publicly on the internet, are free and available for all to see and use as they wish.
10. Questionable media

A fun night at the bar, a wild trip with the girls, some lewd dancing when you were on top of the world – these sound like great experiences, and they are not forbidden for classy ladies. However, they’re not moments you want to plaster over the internet.
What if a future employer, the company of your dreams, approaches you years from now but finds a very unflattering, embarrassing or inappropriate photo/video of you on social media, thereby losing the opportunity?
Nobody says it’s fair, but these things can happen. Don’t play with your reputation, career, or any future opportunities!
11. Talking about your failures

Shades of grey can apply to this topic in certain circumstances. Particularly for influencers or online business owners: if you’re sharing advice, opening up, trying to help others in overcoming challenges that you have now successfully risen over, there is indeed a higher purpose and a level of courage in doing so.
But if you must, do it with grace and diplomacy, and mind your language as well as the things you share.
If it’s concerning a relationship, classy ladies don’t diss other people.
If it’s a job, they don’t throw a company under the bus. It’s messy and calling for drama.
If it’s personal shortcomings, they’re forgiving and loving towards themselves, because if they are self-deprecating or belittling themselves, it’s not helping anyone — least of all themselves.